jenny's belly

Decent News, Finally!

I can NOT believe I am awake right now. Acid reflux didn't wake me up but what did? I'm exhausted but restless, a seemingly impossible combination.

I had a busy day, I actually went into work this afternoon! I didn't get any work done, obviously (it has been a month after all, I'm not exactly hooked into what's going on) but it was so nice just to sit in my chair. It gave me a great feeling of belonging and a renewed sense of "I'll be back" which I think is extremely important. I'm very glad I went and recommend anyone in my shoes do the same. Just visit work and sit in your cube/office for a few minutes. See if you don't feel the same.

My parents and I met my radiologist, which is why we were in Boston. Dr. Mamon's online picture is so outdated it's actually amusing to me. He's an extremely intelligent guy and took a lot more time with us that I think was scheduled. Dork that I am I wanted to know what Radiation IS and DOES. He explained it all in great detail which is important to me... I need to be able to go in for treatment not thinking "what the heck are these stupid light beams doing" but rather "these beams are hurting the bad cells with the good, so after I get out of here I have to help the GOOD cells heal before my next treatment." You have to believe positive thinking plays an enormous part in this. Even if you don't think that way, you would if you were in my shoes. It's the only control I really have!

I learned my cancer is stage 2. WAS stage 2. I also learned that stage 2 stomach cancer is rarely recorded. It's usually found at stage 3 or 4. The doctor was quite optimistic about the chances of my cancer being GONE right now, and that treatment just improves the odds it won't come back. He talked more about the study (standard and standard plus) and convinced me that the side effects aren't significantly different. More important still, I decided that if cancer returned in say, three years, I'd be furious with myself that I didn't TRY to do all I could for myself. So I signed up for the study. I'll have to go through an evaluation and then the miserable computer in NC will decide which treatment plan I'll get. (Lisa B if you could spill some soda in that computer for me, it would be great :) )

Lots was clarified for me-- like I'll only have to go through ONE course of radiation, not THREE. (phew) The whole process will still likely take 4-6 months, but it seems so much more do-able to me now. It will go: Chemo, Chemo + Radiation, Rest, Chemo, Chemo. Each section is about a month long.

I'm dizzy and feeling yucky right now (maybe that's what woke me up?) so I'm signing off. More to come...

Jen

posted by Jen at 1:15 AM